2015年09月19日雅思写作考试权威点评

环球教育苏州分校 李明明

A类小作文

【作文类型】线图

【作文题目】: The two line graphs show thepercentage of people using public transport and people using private cars infive different cities in Australia from 2000 to 2010.

【作文图片】（回忆版本，仅供参考）

【综合点评】动态图中的的两个线状图，难度中等。虽然单个来看都较为简单，写作时仍须注意如下几个问题：1.把握图中数据的总体特征以及特殊数据（如最大值、最小值、变化幅度等）；2.由于线较多，需要注意表达的丰富性，否则单纯的罗列容易重复，不易得高分；3.分段；4.时态；5.两幅图的关联在于内在的互补性，即：公共交通的使用与私家车基本是矛盾的，一方多时则另一方少。

【真题解析】

P1（改写题目+总体趋势）The two linecharts illustrate the modes of transport people chose in five major cities inAustralia by percentage during a 10-year period between 2000 and 2010. Overall,the popularity of public transport declined steadily while the reverse was truefor private car use over the period referenced.[OR Overall, public transportenjoyed much less popularity with citizens compared with private cars.]

P2 (写第一幅图，公共交通使用变化情况概述+例子，总分结构）

如下几个例句仅供参考：

A.(Ascan be seen from the first graph, )The use of public transport witnessed anoverall decline amongst all five cities investigated.

B.Generally,there was a downward trend in the use of public transport.

C.Publictransport use in Sydney (approximately 20%) was considerably higher over thetime-period than in the other four cities whereas in Adelaide only half of thatpercentage of people chose to use public transport (at around 10%).

D.Sydneyranked first in that public transport enjoyed the highest percentage of publicuse at around 20%, closely followed by Perth at around 18%; while in Adelaide,slightly less than 10% of people opted for mass transit for traveling.

E.Thepopularity of public transit use declined minimally over the period. Two of thebest examples were Sydney and Adelaide where the percentages dipped from 20%and 10% to 18% and 8% respectively.

P3 (写第二幅图，私家车的使用变化情况+例子，总分结构）

可以参考例句：

A.However,/On the other hand, the use of private carsbecame more prevalent/widespread,which was best evidenced by the case ofAdelaide and Perth.

B.As high as 80% of citizens in Adelaide used cars fortravel in 2000, and this figure had risen by 10% to 90% a decade later, (whichwas) almost 9 times that of people accessing public transport. However, privatecar use had a much lower percentage in Perth where only a fifth to a third ofpeople drove private vehicles.

C.Similarly, the use of cars in cities like Brisbaneand Melbourne also showed a 10% increase during this period.

P4 (结尾段可以和开头段合并或分开，为了条理性更好，同时兼顾时间紧张等因素，考生可以根据自身情况来决定具体做法）

A类大作文

【作文题目】Some people think everyone should be a vegetarian, because people donot need to eat meat to stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

【题目分析】 观点类。审题本身难度不大，但论证难度较大。需要考生平时注意积累素材，尤其是相应的词汇，比如营养成分等的表达。否则论述容易重复且空洞。

【题材类别】社会生活类

【类似真题】

2010.12.11

Scientistssay that junk food is harmful to people’s health. Some say the best way to stoppeople from eating too much fast food is to educate them, while others sayeducation does not work. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

2014.12.13

Thosefoods that have been scientifically proven to be bad for health should not beallowed to be sold at stores. Do you agree or disagree?

【谋篇布局】

大作文写作需要扬长避短，在力所能及的范围内写出一篇漂亮的学术文章。在此仅提供两种思路，供烤鸭们参考：

【路线一】科学帝路线，适合科学知识较为丰富的考生；

支持素食者(Pro vegetarians)：

1.寿命更长longer life-expectancy in general；inner peace, peace-lovers;

2.健康体重 healthy weight; vegetables are rich in fibers（纤维）which/that are beneficial to people’s digestion; 不必担心过度肥胖等问题For vegetarians, obesity is not an issue of concern since they donot take in more nutrients than they need.

3.胆固醇低，lower cholesterol levels, unlikely to give rise to high blood pressureand heart-related diseases；

4.寄生虫较少 less likely to be infested with parasites, which are typicallycarried by animals. 素食本身较为健康

5.价格低廉 Fruit and vegetables are generally much less expensive than meat ofvarious kinds.

6.美味 delicious/delectable

7.激起食欲 arouse one’s appetite

8.较为环保(eco-friendly)，节约能源(lessenergy-consuming)，因为生产肉食耗费能量多。Somescientists even argue that humans may have to convert to vegetarians so saveenergy in the future as the earth might fail to feed such large population.

9.素食可以预防癌症 reduce the risk of cancer， cancer of colon （大肠癌）inparticular, the risk of which can be extremely high because of meat-eating.

10.酸碱中和 acid-base neutralization

11.营养丰富，比如蛋白质含量在坚果、豆类等中高于肉类Nuts and beans are highly nutritious/rich in proteins which arevital for people’s well-being.

支持杂食者（balanced diet;omnivorous animals)：

1.营养均衡（to acquire balanced nutrition)

2.符合人类进化需要 in accordance with human evolution;

Malnutrition 营养不良

Protein 蛋白质

Mineral 矿物质

Amino acid 氨基酸

Vitamins 维生素

Meatarian/carnivore肉食者

Omnivore 杂食者

【路线二】文艺清新范儿，适合人本主义者和专业知识较为贫乏、同时可以开脑洞者。

Para 1:Introduction.（背景引入，摆明立场）

It is generally accepted that humanshave evolved from meatarians to omnivores over the course of history.Vegetarians, however, claim that they are the future of mankind and thateveryone should convert to one. Personally, I do not agree with this notion.

Para 2: BodyParagraph 3 (让步段)

Admittedly, vegetables have become anindispensable part of people’s daily diet as they provide us with nutrientssuch as vitamins, sugar, fat and proteins. There is an increasing number ofvegetarians around the world today, and vegetables and fruits have been welcomemore sincerely than ever; however, this does not mean that our right to meatconsumption should be deprived of.

Para 3:Body Paragraph1（分论点1）

To begin with, to stay healthy is notthe sole reason for people’s intake of food. If the aim or only purpose ofeating is to provide nutrition, present-day people can live on pills instead ofcooked meals. Delicacies are enjoyment that functions not only to our physicalwell-being, but equally importantly, to our psychological fulfillment. Andpeople in various cultures have been extremely innovative and passionate aboutinventing new ways of cooking and adding new ingredients to their recipes. Itis more often than not that vegetables are served as either appetizers orseasonings to main courses which are generally meat on grand occasions.

Para 4：Body paragraph 2 (分论点2）

Another point is that people haveevery reason to eat as they like as long as it does not violate the law, andthere should not be any imposed preachings on personal choices. In other words,meatarians or omnivores themselves have their right and final say over whatthey would like to eat.

Para 5: Conclusion（总结论点）

To conclude, it is unnecessary foreveryone to be a vegetarian. A balanced diet can be promoted to ensure thatpeople eat healthily and happily so that food-related problems like obesity andheart diseases can be avoided.

(302 words)